The Goal is to Thrive Not Just Survive

The pandemic changed many realities for many individuals and created a lot of uncertainty for what the future would look like. As a society, we had never been faced with so much uncertainty. For many, that led to anxiety and fear. As family members, entrepreneurs, creatives, college students and all members of society, the last few years were filled with unpredictability. Businesses were closing every day and Black-owned businesses were hugely disproportionately affected by the pandemic. There was and still is a sense of fear globally when we think of the effect on the economy. No one is sure what post pandemic recovery looks like for us as a society and individuals.

For those who lead in any capacity, we felt the weight of people looking for guidance. And still we were grappling with much of the same uncertainty as everyone else. It is easy to become paralyzed by fear or uncertainty, but I understood that the only way to see greater, was to disconnect from the past. Which required us to focus on centering ourselves before supporting others on their journey. We had to focus on the present and the possibilities of the future.

Helping others is my life's work and it gives me great joy to do what I do. Even so, managing the deep emotions I have connected to it, is essential. So every opportunity, I push myself to learn and grow to create a space of optimal peace, compassion, creativity and understanding, so that I honor each and every life opportunity with my very best. I recently had the pleasure of participating in the Stand Tall Coaching Emotional training at UCLA, where we began each session with a Mindfulness practice. These moments would allow me to take a deep breath and realign to the purpose that brings me joy. It is so easy to get caught up in the anxiety of our world and create a future based on surviving not thriving.

Only when I am living in the present - a gift of time - can I truly help myself, which is the primary reason that Mindfulness is an integral part of my daily practice. I become centered with my thoughts which allows me to be aware of my body and relaxes my mind so that I can fully engage with my family, friends, on my job, those I mentor and even in leisure. Only when we live in the present can we truly value it and reflect on the gift of the past.

Mindfulness is a great way to ground yourself to your present reality. Some easy techniques to practice Mindfulness are to set aside time for yourself and cultivate activities that let you stay in the present moment. When I feel overwhelmed, I will take a mindful walk and pay special notice to the world around me. The sights and sounds of the ocean, the serenity of the mountains, or simply people walking by. I let the gratitude for that moment, for the journey that led me there take shape in my heart and I am centered once again. Sometimes I will create a journal of affirmations to myself to remember that I am worthy of all the blessings, health, love and abundance that I am bountifully receiving. If none of these methods work for you or you feel like you need help, reach out to coaches, counselors, therapists, or meditation/mindfulness clinics or retreats. You do not have to do it alone.

In my article last week, I touched a bit on looking at the past as a place of healing, and I wanted to touch on the importance of that. As we practice Mindfulness, we are often confronted with our history and our "mistakes." If you are carrying the traumas and hurts from your past, you are living there 24/7. This is not beneficial to your overall mental health. Yes, it is important to revisit our past, but it is not healthy to somber in it. When you live in the feelings of regret and pain, not allowing yourself to heal and move forward, your mind retells your negative stories, keeping you in the past and letting these wounds fester. When you forgive your past, including the people, the places, and the situations you entered that did not serve or align with your higher self; you give yourself the space and permission to embrace your future - arms wide open.

Practice self-kindness and forgiveness by acknowledging who you were in the past, and giving yourself grace, because you did the best you could with the information you had at the time. Recognize that your past decisions don't have to be your future ones. Permit yourself to release the guilt, resentment, and anger that you feel towards your past. These emotions do not serve you and instead take away from the beauty of who you are becoming. Self-love and confidence begin with self-acceptance and forgiveness.

When we love and forgive ourselves, we are willing to take more chances, try different things, and believe in our purpose to be great. If I still saw myself as a person who was "laid off from a job," how could I be here in my present, that is filled with realities that I thought only existed only in my dreams. Here I am leading the conversations weekly around embracing your greatness. I had to see it in myself, no matter what, otherwise, I would always be stuck in a limited and unfulfilled version of me.

Be mindful of every moment, as the famous song from "Rent" says, we have five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes in a year - every one of those moments is an opportunity for a new beginning, for a restart, and a chance to forgive. And this my friend is the pathway and gear-shift from surviving to THRIVING, because YOU are destined for GREATER. COMMENT below and share how this article inspires you to move from surviving to THRIVING.

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